“Early dog gets the worm.” Said Jemima Beagle, waking up her litter of puppies for the day. “But I don’t want a worm.” Said Rufus, rubbing his eyes. “Me Neither.” Whined Hannibal. Wilma was on her feet and out the door in a second, chasing after the worm. She chased it across the road, over…
And now for hot takes with an idiot. The part of the show where hot takes on major cultural events are shared within a year or two of the event taking place. Falling squarely into our purview today is perhaps the most foundational cultural event of the decade, perhaps even of the millennium. I speak,…
The car skidded to a stop by the curb, and out jumped two hooded men. From the third floor apartment Gerald pulled back the window and peered anxiously down. They were on to him. He might as well give himself up now, or things would be even more difficult. He looked up at the blue…
The smallest grain of sand Can weigh a million pounds depending on how you define a million pounds
Aim for the stars. They said. And it sounded like a good idea. I took my lever action 30-30 Winchester out into the backyard, pointed it up at the sky and squeezed the trigger. I knew it would take a long time for my bullet to hit the stars, so I went inside and had…
The growth of science often comes in rapid bursts, which follow years, decades, sometimes centuries, of malaise and inertness. So it was that When Jacob Muttermutt came on the scene the pace of scientific discovery had ground to an almost complete halt. Jacob, of course, changed all of that, and this was was only natural.…
Whenever I back up in my car the little screen on the dash says “check surroundings for safety.” I always used to look around and see if I could see safety anywhere, but I never did. Today, as I was backing up, I heard a big crunch. I jumped out of the car, and ran…
I ain’t got time, but I got money So much so that it ain’t funny Mmmmmmmmmm Money, money money It’s nice to have money, I’ve always had this huge fear of getting hit by a bus, so because I had so much money I bought all of the buses and sent them to the junkyard.…
Gerald was walking through the forest minding his own business when a knight on a white horse reared up in his path. Technically the horse reared. The knight didn’t rear up at all. In fact, the knight had no idea how to handle a rearing horse, and landed flat on his katush. “You ok?” Asked…
You thought your life was easy Because you were a cow You tried not to be cheesy While pulling on the plow You kept on being sneezy Where does it put you now? When all the winds are breezy And all the fields are plowed Though you may be quite sleazy You still are just…
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