Gideon is mostly famous for putting out fleeces in the dew and watching his soldiers drink water, but after he died there was a bit of a power vacuum in the land of Israel. Gideon’s son Abimelech decided to step into the void, and convinced a bunch of his relatives that he was the man…
Over the last few years Troll Farms of all shapes and sizes have been popping up around the globe. Although startling reports have emerged about the condition of these farms, little has been done to contain the environmental damage caused by these monstrous aberrations of nature. The noxious fumes and vapors which emanate from these…
Got moldy dishes in the sink This world is teetering on the brink Man I sure am in a fink And all these politicians stink Think I’ll look at my phone and drink Think I’ll look at my phone and drink Rum, tick-tok and daiquiris Twitter, scotch and instagram Gosh who even needs a fam?…
The grass is always greener on my side of the fence. This is a result of the fact that I use Spinkmaster’s Lawn Food and Plant Vitamin Mixture, in addition to daily watering and regular mowings. Once I have completed my daily lawn care ritual I lean on the pickets and silently disparage my neighbor’s…
Your Questions Answered; Day 8 what is your reason for living? –Goldy I’m not sure if this is where Goldy was going with this question, but this is where I’m going. If you’re wondering if there’s a reason to go on living, if you’re contemplating suicide and putting it all behind you I know what…
Your Questions Answered; Day 6 How do you know you write the dumbest blog ever? –Jim There is little agreement concerning America’s newest sport sensation, but we can all agree that Lia Thomas knows how to swim. That ability, however, is not what makes Lia special. Lia is special because Lia has realized that self-perception…
Your Questions Answered; Day 4 The many uses of a baseball bat? –Paul A toothpick for trolls Something to whittle A tool for fending off moose Shortening conversations with the neighbors Kneading bread As a juggling prop Something to fix furniture with Stirring the pot An instrument to to carry while speaking softly a rug…
Legend has it that former President Barack Obama had a plaque in his office which read “the arc of history bends towards justice.” Whatever the original meaning of this quote, in Obama’s case the saying symbolized the type of post cold-war neo-liberalism determinism which had been famously championed by his predecessor Bill Clinton. The idea…
Oh my barrel’s got a hole in it My barrel’s got a hole in it I’ll plug it if I can But if I can’t it’s grand Oh my barrel’s got a hole in it Oh my milk pail’s got a hole in it My milk pail’s got a hole in it I’ll bash it…
The fever pitch of war has a way of obscuring something very fundamental: war is bad. Completely and utterly bad. Stalwart heroes and just causes cannot alter this reality. Right now the people of Ukraine are heroes to the world, and that heroism is deserved. But it does nothing to diminish the ugliness of war.…
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