807: Crystal Fish

Free range fish farming and organic methamphetamine should never mix. Unfortunately Sandro B. Farmer learned that lesson far too late in life. Above all else, Sandro was an idealist. That’s why he started the free range fish farm in the first place. He loved to tend to his schools of Sole on the pleasant beach…

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806: Why Did The Dog Die?

Odysseus never wanted to go to Troy. He was perfectly content to stay at home and go hunting with his dog, Argos. Argos was a promising young pup, if ever there was one, but duty, or Agamemnon, called Odysseus to Troy before the dog could fully mature. The Trojan war could hardly be counted as…

805: Fish, Shoot, Feed

Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Actually, depending on the size of the fish you could feed him for several days, or merely provide him with an appetizer. What really gums up the works, however, is if you teach the same individual to fish. No longer will he be…

804: We Are Jung

The 2011 smash hit single “We are Young” by American something band Fun. is often mistaken as an anthem of youthful recklessness. In reality it is an ode to 20th century Swiss psychoanalyst Carl Jung. No convincing argument has yet been put forward to counter those who claim this to be a distinction without a…

803: Pot & Pan

Pot always liked a good joke. The frustrating thing was that his companion Pan had absolutely no appetite for humor. “Hey Pan,” said Pot. “Do you know why Homer couldn’t spell fish?” Pause. Pan didn’t say anything. “No i’s!” Pot burst out laughing. “Hey Pan, do you know why I’m so good at telling jokes?”…

802: E[]ection Day!

No one took more pride in his work than Aaron. He was always on time, always eager, and sometimes a little slow. Every morning he was filled with enthusiasm, and each evening he drove home feeling with the satisfied feeling that he was making a difference in the world. Aaron worked at a sign company,…

801: Winter Morning Phone Call

A number of you requested a recap of the theatrical production I just produced. I’m honestly pretty bad at those sorts of recaps, so here are some tangentially related musings. It was just a normal Monday morning in January. Several inches of snow had fallen over the weekend, and a bit of a cold spell…

800:The Bullet

Faster than a speeding bullet Eric Turnermugger’s mullet Showed it’s plumage like a pullet Til one day he got his skull hit With a speedy little bullet That’s my tale Why don’t you mull it? Photo by Chris J Mitchell on Pexels.com

799: Human Unity

There is only one thing which unites humanity: it is a very simple thing, really. The thing which unites humanity is the little plastic clips which clasp bread bags together. Don’t ask me to explain. You would be asking too much. To be honest, there are a lot of things I don’t understand. One of…

798: My Plantation, My Choice

I skinned my cat last night. I have always been told that there are a million different ways to skin a cat, but based on my experience last night I can’t imagine that any of them are easy. She howled with pain on the first incision, and scratched out at me. I had to tie…