Roderick was the luckiest of all galley slaves, and it wasn’t because the callouses on his hands had a tensile strength higher than titanium. It wasn’t particularly lucky to spend twenty-one hours every day rowing, nor was it lucky that the ship on which Roderick caught fire, and that he burned to death while tugging at the oars.
In fact, the string of what could be called “bad luck” had followed Roderick from the time he was a small child, when his village had been burned, his parents killed and he had been carried off to be a slave in the galleys.
After that nothing particularly interesting had happened to Roderick. He spent his days rowing. That was it.
Until, one day, a worm hole opened up from the future. By total chance an entire Snickers bar fell through the worm hole and landed on Roderick’s lap. He ate the whole thing.
It was bliss.
That night Roderick’s ship caught fire and he burned to death at the oars.
Up Helly Aa (7) – the Burning Galley by Anne Burgess is licensed under CC-BY-SA 2.0
Dumbest Blog Ever 
This should totally be a Snickers commercial
I would love to get paid for my writing!
Before 1970 Snickers was known as Marathon in the UK. It seems appropriate that Roderick died happy after his marathon rowing life!
Exactly!
I sniggered and it fell through a wormhole. It’s possible, given his upbringing, that Roderick got confused.
Let’s booger!