260: The Fortune Teller

Agnes was a traveling fortune teller. Some businesses, like lumber yards or hotels, don’t work very well if you’re moving them around all the time. Fortune telling is not one of these businesses. In fact, fortune telling is a great business to move around. Especially if you’re kind of a quack.

Agnes wasn’t a quack, but she wasn’t very good at her job. She loved reading palms, but she could never figure out if the squiggly lines meant long life, or imminent death. She hated telling people they were going to die, so she generally went with long life. She was generally wrong.

One young man, immediately after visiting Agnes, fell down the stairs of her traveling fortune telling wagon. This wouldn’t have been an issue except that her wagon was parked on the edge of the cliff. The coroner thought the parking arrangement was rather strange.

A few days later an elderly woman choked on a muffin which Agnes had graciously offered her. A third customer mysteriously drowned.

Unfortunately Agnes had a difficult time getting the authorities to see this as a recurring issue, since the mysterious deaths always seemed to take place under different jurisdictions.

Strange coincidences aside, Agnes gets rave reviews from most of her customers. Agnes’s Fortune Telling Wagon has a five star rating on Yelp.com

Photo by Alina Vilchenko on Pexels.com

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25 thoughts on “260: The Fortune Teller

  1. I went (this is a true story and it cost me a couple of bucks) to a fortune teller at the local Fair. She gave me a chant to chant naked as I danced in the next full moon. I didn’t do it – for reasons I won’t explain here – and have had freakin’ bad luck ever since. Thanks for the story. I can relate to it.

  2. what can I say-the fortune teller of misfortune, quite like reality really…You are told everything is sunshine and rainbows but in reality, reality can get quite nasty
    I went off tangent there, great post though!

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