I’ve been reading a lot of good stuff lately, but the literature I write about probably gives the wrong impression of who I am. The most precise way I can describe myself is that I’m a guy in podunk Wisconsin who washes dishes on Saturday mornings. There’s nothing erudite or fancy about that.
I have a growing list of books on ancient history to delve into. In particular Ancient Greece has my attention at the moment. Is there a larger project in the offing connected to all of this Ancient Greece reading? Maybe.
But redundancy is bad for the soul. Reading too much of one type of book inevitably leads to boredom of the mind. And boring minds lead to boring people. Data indicates that the world does not suffer from a lack of boring people, so there’s no need for me to become boring to aid world stability.
It’s time to read the dumbest book ever. The problem is that I have no idea what book is the dumbest. So I’m turning to the great people who read this blog.
Give me a pitch on a book that you believe is the dumbest book you’ve ever read. I will pick one book which sounds dumber than all the rest and read it by May 1st.
The winner of the dumbest book challenge will be reviewed on this blog.
Pick wisely, argue forcefully.
May the dumbest book win!
“Edward Trencom’s Nose” by Giles Milton. It is an historical novel of dark intrigue and cheese. The pong of ripe limburger lingers impressively. (That cheese (in case you didn’t know) is especially known for its strong smell). This book is completely nuts. I giggled mercilessly all the way through. So even though it’s the dumbest book ever written (other than Laurence Sterne’s “The Life and Times of Tristram Shandy”) it remains readable and entertaining. Given that your gravatar has two noses I would imagine that you’d be able to sniff this book out. Nine generations come to sticky ends because of their genetically inherited noses.
Finally, anyone who introduced me to the All-American term of “podunk” – a term I shall begin to introduce into the parlance of the antipodes – deserves to read this book. Get it and stick your bloody nose into it.
Cheese is always a plus, here in Wisconsin we like it so much we make our heads out of it. I am quite intrigued.
This book therefore should be right up your Wisconsin alley.
Perhaps, since it has cheese in it is the reason it was such a cheesy book?
It seems likely.
I hated, loathed, detested, disliked and just plain would never recommend to anyone The Lord of the Flies and Catcher in the Rye. Unfortunately, I can’t make a good pitch for either of them because I hated them so much I tried to forget anything about them.
I have read Lord of the Flies, but not Catcher in the Rye. Can you make a bad pitch for it?
Hmm…It’s been a long time since I read it and I donated it back to the Goodwill when I was done.
Nice.
Meow – the book written for your cat in its own language. And luckily, you can read the entire thing right here! https://www.amazon.com/Meow-book-only-Written-language/dp/1979337101#reader_1979337101
Nice. I am showing this to me dog.
Mmm… to recommend the dumbest book, I would like 1. The parameters as to what qualifies as dumbest and 2. Do I have time to read every book so that I can give an informed recommendation?
I’m in a quandary. Should I recommend one of my own books and plead modesty for calling them dumb?
Is a dumb book a disliked, detestable book or one that offers help for people in a plethora of subjects?
Do I recommend those ghost written autobiographies of 21 year old ‘celebrities’ even though I haven’t read them?
So much to ponder.
Good questions. I left this open ended so people could come to their own opinion on what dumb is. You could certainly recommend one of your own books, but as I already plan on reading them anyway it may behoove you to consider that such a recommendation will constitute a redundancy on my reading list. My thought is that you would share a book you have read which you consider to be dumb, however you interpret that. But bend the rules however you like. It’s an art, not a science.
Much as I like horses and ungulates, I will avoid being behooved. Thank you, Joe. Now I shall cogitate on my suggestion.
Obviously I will only read books written by Joe.
Of course.
I have a contender! Birdbox by Josh Malerman.
Marvel at some of the dumbest biology ever recorded, including wolves scratching prey with their paws and women bungee jumping from their babies umbilical cords!
Rejoice over the much lauded dumb characters, whose inventions fall apart as soon as they’re constructed.
Fascinate at the dumb plotting that includes 21st century pivotal points – newspapers and phone books!
Be horrified by the lack of knowledge about all aspects of life, including plumbing, hygiene and much more!
Be appalled at the dumb sentence structure that results in eyeballs carrying a briefcase into the kitchen.
And much much more dumbness!
(Warning, dumbness much greater and less entertaining than advertised).
Sounds incredible. I think I’ll start training my eyeballs to carry things for me. It sounds like it would come in handy.
It is a useful but mostly forgotten skill now that hands have taken over in popularity for carrying needs.
Sad.
Well, my pitch for Catcher in the Rye being the dumbest book of all time is almost as ridiculous as the book itself. A teenage boy who fluctuates from depression to happiness back down to depression again, cusses a lot and wishes he could have sex. The book was written before modern methods of treating Bipolar Disorder or else it would only be a page and a half long. Teenage male angst, written for an adult audience. Definitely, a don’t-read. Unless you are looking for something stupid.
Which is exactly what I am looking for. Thanks.
Pingback: 497: Dumbest Book Ever: A Buddy Read With Myself | Dumbest Blog Ever